He Married 'My Wife'


How they met

The biggest mistake he ever did was introduce his fiance to his best friend. 

John and Alex met at the local social center in their estate where they used to play table tennis during school holidays. They became very close, even their parents became friends courtesy of the two young men. They spurred one another in their studies and pretty much spent a lot of time together. Incidentally, both of them wanted to study economics. 

Alex's dad took him to London School of Economics while John to Makerere University. They kept in touch and all throughout University, talked about the girls that they fancied. They had made a pact to be each other's best man when their time for marriage came. 

In his final year John struck gold with a pretty damsel. He went to the bank and was smitten by this 'something' that was serving him. In his his mind she was a sweet something because compared to the campus chics who looked like a minimum balance, this one looked like an overdraft of a premium account with so many perks. 

She knew how to wear a smile, the skirt suit she wore was just meant for him, her hair was like royal tapestry, make up just on point and her scent was something close to lavender and a dash of wild roses. You would think that God was unfair to plant so much beauty in one package...Hmmm, that sounded like a nice pick up line....he thought to himself.

He rehearsed it over and over in his mind until he didn't notice when she was asking him for his student ID. He mumbled some unintelligent words, fumbled through his pockets and emptied the contents of his wallet on her desk and coins were sprawled all over the banking hall...he was apologizing to her and running across the banking hall.....you get the picture.

That was their debut and Hazel, just couldn't help but laugh at his clumsiness. She pitied the young man but then made him feel at ease. What she didn't know was that the creative genius in him crafted that move in a split second. He wanted her to notice him and so he played the clumsy clown so that he could stand out and remain tattooed in her mind.

2 days later, the young man came back to the bank, looking fine, crisp and modest. Idris Elba was no match for him for even his bounce had an extra edge. He scribbled something on the withdrawal slips and went straight to her desk and placed it in front of her.

"Good Mor....", She started but stopped as she read the slip.

"It's not fair? Sorry, I don't understand.

"I don't think that its fair that God would plant so much beauty in a pretty damsel like you." John said as he confidently sat down and fixed his gaze on her.

She looked at him surprised and then she remembered him

"YOU!!!, you were the guy who...." then she burst out in a naturally choreographed laughter that even made him more endeared.

With a few more rehearsed lines, he was able to convince her to come for coffee the next day. In her mind she was just sorry for the young dude who was really trying to impress her but clearly he was a student and she was already working, but since he insisted, she decided to appear for the date. She bit the bait and that was all that John needed and 5 months later, they were already dating. He was the cautious and studious type, always calculating and planning before he executes.

All her girlfriends thought that she had lost her mind. She was dating a guy who was 2 years younger and was still student?

"But, he is graduating next month" Hazel defended him

"Even if he graduated yesterday, the dude is younger than you. That means you are 100 light years ahead of him" Alice said

"He is still a boy and you are a grown woman" Jeni added

"I'm not a woman, I'm a lady", Hazel added cheekily

"You know that he is after your money right?" Alice said

Nooo, not at all, he has never asked me for a dime. Even when he doesn't have cash, he takes me to the park and we stroll there and he was a way of making the world stand and seem motionless when he focuses on me and it's just special. You guys should meet him.

- Hazel 

Jeni gave the naughty look, "Do, you like the shag?"

The what, Noooo, John made it very clear from the day we started dating that he is a Christian and he doesn't want to cross that line with me because he fears God more than anything else and that was one thing that just melted my heart because you all know the last loser I dated and what happened. That just melted my heart.

- Hazel 

The conversation went on and on until they were convinced that they needed to meet this campus guy who had taken over the world of mighty Hazel.

"You need to meet her, " John told Alex

Alex laughed over the phone, "Is this one of your tired flings?"

No Alex this is special. We are talking about a combination of G8 and G20 summit all in one feminine package.

She is smart, pretty, nice dash board, decent fashion sense. Her hips were not made in a hurry, she actually has a waist line and she is born again.

This is it bro, this is the girl of my dreams and I'm going to marry her.

- John

"Did you say marry her? Dude, this Ugandan girl must have bewitched you...did she go all down on her knees and captivate you with that ..."

"Hahahaha, No guy, this lady is complete package configured just for me. She is the epitome of...."

"John, okay let's get serious. You are graduating next month, the only thing that you can pride yourself in is that you can vote and going by the reports in Kenya, who knows how many Chebukati's servers, don't even know that you exist."

Both burst out in laughter

But then this girl is already working, she has her money and being as attractive as she is, what makes you think that she is not seeing someone else of her caliber and pedigree?

She could be keeping you as her side dish. She will damp you before you say amen.

- Alex


"Eh...., no, we are not having sex and its been 8 months now, i think i would have known if she was seeing someone else unless she is really good at hiding and covering her tracks. I would like you to meet her."

John was due to graduate in slightly over a month and he had  told his parents about this working class lady who had captivated him and that he was actually considering marrying her. His dad asked him a few questions to ascertain if she was genuine and if he was serious with her and pledged his support to them. His mother was a bit skeptical because they were from different worlds. Their social, economical and cultural backgrounds were not congruent and that in her view didn't seem like a good foundation.

"Mum, don't worry, you will love her as soon as you meet her", John assured her.

"I will be praying for you my son", his mum said as she hung up.

Hazel's girls got to meet John a week to his graduation and they sort of liked him. According to them, he wasn't 'all that' like Hazel described him but he was definitely better than any other guy she had dated. He was good looking, responsible, solid and sober. They were satisfied that this was real love. If Hazel of all people could fall in love with a guy two years younger and actually consider settling down with a broke guy, then Jesus will indeed return for His church.

Alex flew in 2 days before his best friend's graduation. He wanted to meet this girl that had seized the mind of the level headed John. He was the sober one amongst the two, but men... he was talking marriage barely a year after meeting this girl and she was earning her own money. This was serious!

So that evening, all five of them went out for coffee and there was lots of chattering and laughter. They were the last ones to leave that joint. That night, John asked Alex what he thought of Hazel.

"I don't know man, seems like she is too good for you," He said and gave him a sly look and smile. "I'm pulling your leg, you have a gem and boy I'm proud of you!" They shared a hearty laughter.

What John didn't know is that there was something in Hazel....there was this thing in his woman, that had mad Alex get an instant magnetic attraction to her. There was an allurement in her eyes that seemed to beckon him and he wanted more of that.

What was even more puzzling, was that there was a chord that struck in both Hazel and Alex when they exchanged glances that whole evening. No one apart from them noticed it and it even though they tried to ignore it, they couldn't deny it in their hearts. This twist would be amplified the next day when the two of them would be alone.

It was on the eve of the graduation ceremony. John had gone to the airport to pick his sister and his parents and he left Alex to hang out with Hazel and to date he still regrets why he allowed that to happen because maybe this story would have ended up differently but then it took a different tangent from what any of them expected.


The graduation

Alex's suave nature took over and he gave Hazel a calculated experience that took her on an emotional tailspin and left her lingering about this strange friend. 

He stimulated her intellect with his vast knowledge on many subjects. It was easy to flow with him because he wasn't in your face but at the same he remained relevant.

Coming back from the airport was a nightmare. Several heads of State had landed in the country for the AU Summit and so John and his family got held up in traffic. This just gave the new friends, Hazel and Alex an opportunity to spend more time together. Alex was loving this, his cheeky sleeve was on and so he decided that he would 'ride this bus until he was told told to alight'.

They talked about God and the new brand of atheism that was gaining momentum, politics and economics, fashion trends, food you name it. He was new in Kampala, but that did not stop him from taking her to various spots in the city to have a good time as they waited for John to show up. Alex was the kind of guy who found delight in squeezing out life out of stones. Put him in a new place and he will not just survive but he will thrive and that is what happened that evening. They walked, took taxify cabs, rode on tuk tuks or bikes just to make do with the stalemate in Kampala that night. He told her about his time in the UK and how she would love it if she ever came to see him.

"Yeah, I would love to, I would really love to come", Hazel blurted out without thinking.

Alex took a long gaze at her as she nibbled her ice cream. He thought about the possibilities that could happen if.....if....if only she was his. For now, John who was more cool and laid back guy had gotten her and he felt a strong propulsion of jealousy grow in him. His selfish desire was to nab her for himself, but then this script didn't favor him in anyway.

John was his best friend and both sets of parents had become friends because of their own friendship. Was he willing to pull a 'Mugabe' on his best friend and risk hurting the all the people around him that mattered? Okay, his assumption was that Hazel would be on board, but what if she didn't fancy him? Nuh....he prided in himself in being a good judge of body language and soft nuances. He could tell that she had developed a fondness for him that if he nudged her then she would tip over onto his side. All he needed to do was invite her into his world of charm, thrill and charisma.

His mind was made up. He had spotted a prey that was readily available on a platter and all he needed was a rapacious appetite with some intentional greed, a seared conscience and he would go for the kill and be home and dry. The backlash would be there, but then he was willing to develop all the shock absorbers to deal with all the messiness that was inevitable. For now, he need some extra pizazz in his existing repertoire of masculine blandishments to disarm this beauty and bring her into a 'je ne sais quoi' moment that would just whet her appetite and leave her panting and wanting for more. The time was flying and John would be here any moment...

"Hello....? A penny for your thoughts...?" Hazel asked

"...huh....", he feigned coming out of a situation, the dude could act.

"You got distant for a while there."

"Sorry, I was just thinking."

"Ehe, please share your thoughts"

"I was thinking about Hazel...."

"You were thinking about me and I'm here"

No, I'm thinking about your name, it's so unique.

Your parents must have seen something special in you to give you such an exceptional name.

I don't know whether it was your eyes or your smile, but I would want to discover why you were given that name. I see a minefield of possibilities in you, and you have a very beautiful name.

- Alex

He said it with a stamping punctuation that betrayed his seductive intentions.

"Thank you...." , Hazel replied while smiling.

Alex wanted to continue asserting his machismo into her system when he heard his cellphone buzz in his back pocket. He had watched too many movies and he knew that this gadget always had the knack of spoiling a romantic moment and since he was in charge of this particular situation, he postponed picking it because he knew that there was a high chance that, that could be John. 

He lunged forward towards Hazel and made as if to kiss her lips, then cautiously and tactfully avoided them and planted a soft peck on her lower cheek, just below the ear. He finished his mission and gingerly brushed his lips with hers, then tactfully leaned back as he watched to asses the damage he had just inflicted on her pretty face.

Hazel was caught flat footed. Her pigmentation was a whole lesson on chromatography, it was a sight to behold. She was clearly enjoying his company but she hadn't envisaged that he would be so audacious in making that romantic overture towards her. She was breathing fast, she looked at him and wanted to say something but she couldn't. Both of them knew that he had crossed the line, but then what surprised her was that she didn't mind it, but then she wanted to set the record straight that she was ....

"It's okay, you don't have to say anything" Alex bailed her out of her mini-misery as he picked the call from John and to give him directions to where they were. She went to the bathroom to freshen up and try to obscure the obvious blush.

His family were meeting Hazel for the first time. During dinner, conversation was light and general, John's sister was looking forward to kind of having a big sister in Hazel, she was amazed at her stature and her delightful personality, and oh she was gorgeous. John's dad was a man of few words and was delighted to meet this lady who had grabbed the attention of his sole heir. John's mum was guarded and wasn't about to be deceived by her looks and so she went on a tactful grilling spree just to find out more about this Mutoro lady.

Hazel, played her part well. John had kind of told about his mother's inquisitive nature and so she was well prepared and answered all the questions she was being asked by her future mother in law. The evening ended well and Mr. Simani and his family went to their hotel. Mrs. Simani felt that something was amiss with this Miss Uganda.  Alex and John, drove Hazel to her apartment, then proceeded to their cubicle.

Hazel felt something move in her heart. She was really trying to get a hold of herself but the reigns were slipping fast. She tried to fight that feeling in her heart by telling herself that she was in love with John and that Alex was just a flash in the pan but it seemed impossible. She found herself comparing the two friends in her head. She wondered how these two guys were so different and yet they were best friends.

When she was with John, the world froze around them as he focused on her with his zoom lens eyes and really making her feel like the most important person at that very moment. Alex on the other hand was a Formula One Racing machine and an upgraded version of Usain Bolt combined into one person. He was sizzling and witty and he took her on a thrill like never before, it was about 4 hours of an epic experience.

She tried to pray that night but then found her mind veering and wondering about this man...She went to bed thinking about him and just as sleep was setting in at around 2:30am a text flashed on her screen.

"I can't sleep"

"Me too", she replied.

"I really had a great time today"

She hesitated in answering

"Same here"

"I'm thinking about you..."

Oh no....she felt the same way but she couldn't bring herself to type those words...she was guilty.

"It's okay, you don't have to say it,"

Those words....he repeated those words again.

"I can feel it. In fact your silence is all the evidence that I need to know that you are thinking about me, no wonder you cannot sleep." 

Aki, this guy had the nerve. He just punctured her feminine wall with so many truths about the way she was feeling at that moment. It's like he flew in from the UK with a copy oh her manual from God. He knew the right buttons to push and boy, he was good at it.

She didn't reply that text and in fact switched off her phone, but sleep was elusive that entire night. Alex was all over.

John's big day was here and she was determined not to ruin it. She found herself changing six different outfits. She knew John's taste but then Mrs. Simani and Alex were now part of the mix. She was struggling really hard to please all three of them. An hour later and nothing was forthcoming. She sat on her bed flustered as she looked at all the outfits. She was the go to person when it came to fashion and style. Her friends always called on her to get ideas on how to style up their wardrobes and here she was struggling to choose one outfit on the day when her boyfriend was graduating.

"Wait, that's it." She thought to herself.

"The  key to unlocking all this is John and not the other two. His mum was going to go back to Kenya and Alex will probably hang around for a few days and then go back to the UK and I will be left with John. This is just some wild infatuation with Alex and it will fizzle out. So let me do this for John".

She picked a dress that would please John and went for his ceremony. It was a colorful event, John graduated magna cum laude. His parents were delighted at his achievement. His baby sis was just wondering why John wasn't getting married to this fashionista on this same day so that she could also have a chance to be on the spotlight with a nice dress. Alex was happy for his friend but at the same time felt sorry for the romantic coup d'etat that was going to happen.

That evening, John again made the clueless blunder of leaving his lady with his main man as he took his family to the airport. Alex took Hazel to John's place. 

As soon as he closed the door, Hazel told him,

"Alex, we need to talk"

"Talk about what Hazel," as he pinned her on the wall with a gentle squeeze that affirmed his intentions.

He edged closer to her and just looked at her eyes as if searching for an iota of resistance. She was breathing fast and the saliva in her mouth dried up. Her heart stopped beating and then as if on cue it erupted like the Isukuti drums in Kenya. She knew what was coming. She could feel it and she knew that she had to stop it, but she then she wasn't sure if she wanted to stop it"


Stolen kisses

In a synchronized move, he leaned on her and his tongue left the station and landed on on her velvet lips and they kissed. It was a nice sensational kiss. A warm floating like feeling enveloped them as the kiss intensified, more inviting and enticing. At that instance, nothing really mattered, it's like they had been translated into a euphoric ecstasy.

The alarm bells went off in Hazel's head when she felt the hardened bulge of his third leg press against her thighs and his left hand veered onto her right breast and she pulled back out of the embrace. She took a moment to catch her breath as she looked away in obvious embarrassment.

"What's the matter?" Alex asked

"We can't do this", Hazel answered

"But, you seemed to be enjoying it"

"Yes, I do but that doesn't make it right" She said as she went for her bag.

"Come on Hazel, this is our chance."

"I'm sorry Alex, we can't!"

She left Alex standing there in a confused state. His script had just been messed by situational irony. He was acting in a play that he had written, selected the cast and was directing, but then it's like he never got wind of the lines in this particular scene. His intention was to have sex with her in John's cubicle. He was going to use his sexual prowess to show him who the real man is because most likely John hadn't ventured anywhere in between her thighs. Anytime they discussed chics, John had always chosen to take the high moral ground of abstinence because he believed in sexual purity.

Alex was also a believer but he was very liberal and more concerned with sexual compatibility. He always told John that there was no way he was going to marry someone's daughter before 'tasting the goods'. He couldn't just live with the idea that it was possible to be with someone whose sexuality is like dried cassava without any hint of salt. That was not his portion. When John challenged him about his faith, he simply replied, "Johnny, faith without action is dead!"

Alex wanted Hazel, nay he lusted after her from that first evening meeting and now that he was alone with her, her had intended to use his amorous skills to woo her over to him so that she could become his 'running mate' for the rest of his life, but she walked out, right in the midst of this romantic scene, leaving him there like a boy who has just been snatched his new toy and been told to go and do his homework, then finish his left over vegetables that were now very cold. 

Well, he consoled himself, that there is always a first time and no matter what happened, he vowed to sleep with her. Hazel on her part was laden with guilt. She had kissed him! She was now tiptoeing in a very grey area and she knew that if she didn't arrest this and nip it in the bud then she would be in an irretrievable situation. She decided to send him a text.

Alex, you are a very nice guy, charming and enchanting and I really enjoyed your company the other day, but today we have crossed the line.

Both of us are Christians and this is not right at all.

John is a very decent guy, he is my boyfriend and I don't want to hurt him. I fear God with all my heart and I would love to wait until I get married to him before I have sex.

We have dated for all this while and the farthest he has gone was a peck on my forehead. Today you and I have kissed and both of us know what would have happened in his house if I didn't pull out....You and I can never be.

I love John and I will get married to him. Please give me space, so that we don't exacerbate this.

- Hazel

Alex felt a lump in his throat as he read that text. He didn't want to believe what he had just read and being the smooth silver tongued guy that he is, he responded pursuant to his own code.

Hazel, you are the emblem of perfection that my eyes have had the supernatural privilege of seeing in this lifetime.

Your beauty cascades in gentle installments that threaten to startle my limited understanding of femininity.

You are a plethora of beauty and meeting you in these few days has made me realize that we have 'been' planted to blossom in the future and so we need to germinate now so that we can happen in the morrow.

Babe, Instead of waiting for it, we need to gallop into it and stake our place. You can't deny the seismic chemistry that exists between us. I can see it your eyes and you can see it in mine...we were meant to be.

- Alex

The tapestry of his words were sweet and silky and there was no need to have a back and forth with him because Alex is the kind of guy who could actually convince you that there is such a thing as fried water. Hazel didn't respond to that text but she tried to give him a wide berth for the next few days that he was around because she couldn't trust herself around him. He was bad boy!

On the last day before he left, Alex went to see her at work and managed to convince her to lunch with him before he flew out. She tried to fight him off, but the guy was resilient. She reckoned that it was his last day, they were going to a public place and he knew that she had to come back to the bank. To cover her bases, she called John to let him know that they were grabbing a snack with Alex and John was cool with it because Alex had already told him.

Hazel was determined to set the record straight with this guy and so all her defenses were up. When he tried to touch her, she pulled back very fast, just to avoid getting sparks from his magical fingers. This was enticing to Alex because he could tell that he had boxed her into a corner, his own corner where he was in charge.

She tried to tell her about the awkwardness of this whole 'thing', but Alex was convinced that they could start a relationship behind John's back, nurture it and then at the opportune moment drop the bombshell to John. 

Molten lava of epic proportions will be spewed from everyone affected or infected either directly or indirectly but then that shouldn't be their problem. 

"Hazel, this is life and its not fair at all. Tell me that you feel nothing for me and that I am imposing myself on you and I will gladly walk away and you will never hear from me." He tasked her.


You see my point, you are stuck with a good boy who is a clone of a boy scout and and a monk. John is a great guy.

A part of me wishes that I could be him , but then I would grow nauseated with me.

Okay the guy is solid, consistent and reliable but that's as good as it gets. You will plateau for the rest of your life and live an ordinary mundane life with no adventure. You will have a lethargic pattern that will ensure you never make it past 50years. You will die of boredom or you will become a nagging wife to your husband.

Is that what you want? Do you want to hurt him now and save him from a lifetime of misery or would you spare him the heartbreak now and then 'punish' him for the rest of his life.....? 

- Alex

On and on, he built his case, which really appealed to her emotional senses. She didn't realize that she was actually giving in because her protective wall had been perforated by the near perfect picture that Alex was painting. From her body language, he was convinced that he was making headway but he forgot one crucial wall...her mind. Hazel, was a very logical person and he forgot to appeal to her rationale. On her part, everything he said seemed right but that doesn't mean that she would just dump the nice guy and pick a random 'bad boy'

No, I'm afraid, we can't happen. I need to get back to work. Safe flight to the UK and I won't be coming to the airport.

- Hazel

She stood up paid the bill and wagged her behind knowing fully well that he would staring at that pair of mounds for the last time. She felt nice that she had managed to put him off despite the emotional lacerations he had dealt her. She concocted a credible excuse to her boyfriend that would explain her absence when he was taking Alex to the airport.

She was really glad to hear from John that Alex had just boarded the plane and was on his way to the UK. She planned to return to normalcy and of course never reveal what had transpired between her and Alex.

John stayed another month in Uganda spending time with Hazel and also praying for direction. He wasn't sure whether to stay, look for a job in Uganda and there by be close to his woman or go back to Kenya; meaning a long distance relationship. They talked it over with Hazel after a month of prayer, both of them were satisfied that going back to Kenya was the best thing for John.

It was hard tearing apart from the love of his life but he did it anyway and in less than a month he got a job with the top accounting firm in Nairobi. The long distance took its toll on them, as their Skype calls became predictably flat. John wanted to marry her in a year's time, but then he knew very well that Hazel was a corporate lady and staying at home would choke her. The president had given an executive order allowing anyone in the continent to hop into the country and work. John convinced Hazel to begin making applications. 

Due to her impeccable credentials, she managed to secure a job with one of the insurance firms in the city and that was the really a major milestone in John's plans...everything was falling into place and he decided to plan his proposal to Hazel so that she could now be his fiance. On her part, she had really tried to be a nice girl. Alex had tried to keep that spark a blaze but to no avail. Her responses to him made him feel like he was clapping with one hand. This really got to him and it even put a strain on his relationship with John. He took time to return calls and respond to his texts. 

He resented him because he felt that he was the better man, but he had gotten the better lady. Deep down he knew that he was meant to be with Hazel and so he wasn't pleased with this whole engagement business and Hazel giving him the cold shoulder. John kept trying to find out why he was so cold, but Alex responded with, "I'm going through a phase, please pray for me". He never even told John when he got back to the country.

His parents wondered what had happened to their son, he was moody and used to shut himself in his room all day. They lived in Runda and and they had a house manager called Nyanduru who had lived with them for 22years. By the time Alex came back, Nyanduru had taken her annual leave and her daughter was holding the fort for her.

Alex noticed the young lady and even though she wasn't his type. He decided to have some fun with the unsuspecting lady. She was already awestruck by the monstrosity of the house and now this guy making moves at her was just something else...

She was a coy person and her demure nature made her an easy target for Alex. He wanted to run through her like a combine harvester on a wheat farm. She gladly giggled as he led her upstairs into his room and placed her on his bed. She was a virgin, but that day Alex deflowered her innocence with the skill of a true slay king. 


Gaudencia Nyanduru

She had crossed the bridge, her name was Gaudencia and one very crucial thing that Alex had forgotten to do, that had been his golden rule as a philanderer, was use to use protection. The innocent naive girl from upcountry was starry eyed and naive, she walked right into his trap. She also wasn't on her safe days, but none of them knew about it. 

John on this other side was ready to propose to his lady and being the meticulous person that he is, he wanted to do it in style. How he wished that Alex would have been here to help him pull this surprise on his lady. 

He told Hazel that he was going to the Coast to do some work for about a week and he would love her to come over the weekend to see some property that he would like to buy. 

She boarded the evening flight and fell asleep almost immediately. It had been a busy week of quarterly appraisals and board meetings. 

"Hazel," the air hostess tapped her gently.

She woke up and yawned in clumsy fashion and then a nice baritone was heard over the plane speakers.

"Attention ladies and gentlemen, this your pilot Captain Maurice Otunga and we are flying at 30,000ft above sea level and we have an important announcement to make" , and he began to recite a poem and as he did that,

John came out of the cockpit dressed in the full uniform of a captain. This is the picture...

The captain was reciting a poem and everyone in the plane could hear it, John came out of the cockpit saying the same words like the captain while walking towards Hazel. He created the illusion that he was the one talking and because he was dressed like the captain, everyone thought he is the one talking. It's only Hazel who was surprised  to see him on the same flight because she knew that the guy was in Mombasa. (Hope you get the picture, if you don't please inbox me or call me...LOL)

"Hazel, my Corlyus from the Northern Hemisphere,

  You are my daring princess and my darling damsel,

  You have given me plenteous joy and lots of laughter,

  From the day my eyes landed on you, I knew that you were the one,

  You are the special one designed for me,

  Indeed the meaning of your name is prophetic,

 Hazel-God sees and its true, he saw the paucity of my heart and made you just for me.

 Today at 30,000ft before all these people, I would like to ask you

Hazel....will you marry me and allow me to be your husband for the rest of your life?"

He finished as he went down on bended knee in the full regalia of a pilot in front of all the passengers who were awestruck by this gesture. John was clearly out of his comfort zone, It had taken him 2 months of planning and rehearsal. This was not his kind of thing because he was a reserved person. So he had to convince himself and then to get all those people with airline to help him pull engagement...This was a major feat for him. So it had come to this juncture and Hazel was sweating, she stared at him smitten, tongue-tied and tears rolling down her cheeks. She couldn't believe it, she was laughing and crying at the same time but was unable to say anything. 

John knelt there sweating and waiting for what was like 3-4 minutes waiting for her response...He hoped that his efforts were not in vain and that she wasn't having cold feet.

"Say something girl?" some white old lady told her.

"Yeah, say yes to the young man, he is getting tired!" , her husband added.

Everyone on the plane laughed.

"YES, Yes, Yesssssssssssss!!!!!! I will marry you!" She said whilst sobbing.

Everyone clapped and it was quite a sight as the ring slipped into her finger and they hugged! They were now engaged.

 Of all the things, that he had ever done, this was the most spectacular one and he went out of his way to do it for her. Their time at the coast now translated into a time of checking out wedding venues. She wanted a beach wedding and he agreed to get along with her wishes. They settled for a beautiful venue at Wasini.

John sent a text to Alex to tell him about his engagement because he had been quiet on him.

"Congratulations",  was all he got and John was really disturbed. He decided to call his parents who were also shocked to hear that Alex hadn't told his best friend that he was in the country because these two lads had been inseparable.  The dad asked Alex to get in touch and he grudgingly agreed.

Clearly something was wrong, because Alex was distant and cold towards John. He didn't even see the big fuss that John was making about not telling him of his return back into the country. John told him about the forthcoming dowry negotiations and invited him to come along. At first he declined but then later on, he thought that this would be a good opportunity to see Hazel and maybe talk to her again. Who knows he might just scuttle this whole engagement business.

In his narcissistic mind, Alex was totally convinced that Hazel was his woman and he couldn't live with the fact that John the simpleton was going to carry the day when it comes to this babelicious lady. He had tried to forget her, he had kept away and respect her space, he had met other ladies who he thought were prettier, but there was on oddity about all of them. They all ended up like chewing gum in the mouth and he spat them out. Hazel was just a feminine magnet, there was a way she captivated him that made him feel enthralled. Then he remembers the kiss, the nice passionate kiss that they shared in John's cubicle was clearly etched in his mind, but then he wanted more, he wanted to have sex with her. He believed that he was supposed to marry her. She belonged to him and not John.

"Alex! We need to talk!" His mum opened the door to his room in a no nonsense manner. She had never done that for the longest time.

"Yes, mum, what's up?"

"It's about Nyanduru's daughter. What have you been doing with her?"

"Nothing mum. She....she...."

"Alex, I'm not stupid and don't you dare lie to me. You came from the UK and all you do is brood the whole day. You don't want to look for a job. Your best friend has been worried about you and now Gaudencia!"

"Mum, you are overreacting"

"Gaudencia has been vomiting for the past two weeks and I asked her if she is okay. She lied to me, but then I'm a mother and I knew that there was something was wrong and so I asked her if she had slept with anyone and again she denied it."

Alex could see where this was going and his toes were now twitching.

"So I took her to the hospital to get treated and of course I asked the doctor to do a pregnancy test and lo the results came out positive. So I pinned her down and I told her to tell me the truth because we are going to support her and the baby. I didn't want the father to be an irresponsible man, who can impregnate her and just zoom off. So I went on and on, trying to assure her, that I will be there for her and all that, little did I know that she is carrying my grandchild...."

"What?????? Alex said as he got up from his bed

"Yes, Alex, you had sex with her and now she is pregnant. Come on deny it. You should have seen how she was shivering when she told me that because she thought that I was going to throw her out. Now I have come to corroborate her story and listen to me well...."

She said as she moved her 4'9 ft stout frame towards her son who stood at 6'2 ft.

....son, you may be taller than me, but please remember that I brought you to this world and I can as well take you out of this world.

I can summarize you before you utter the next lie, because I know that sweet tongue of yours that you use to manipulate yourself in and out of tough spots.

Today don't even imagine that you will lie to me because I will chop off one, just one of your testes with my hands. So sit down and tell me the truth or God help me, I will have your small intestines shipped to China to be processed into cheap toys!

- Alex's Mum

She ended emphatically as she slammed him on his bed.

Alex was dumbfounded and he had just gotten himself into another mess. This was 'messiology' redefined. Gau-something was pregnant with his baby...

"Mum, but it only happened once"

A vicious slap hotter than the Kidero-Shebesh saga, landed on his bearded face like a 10 ton truck. His mother was a Tigress! 

"Don't be stupid. You know very well that even having sex for the first time is enough to make a woman pregnant. Please try another line" , the mum said as she moved her face close to his face till there tips of their noses touched.

"Aki mum I'm sorry. It's true we had sex and yea......"

"Alex, my son!!! Alex, my first born, you have impregnated our employee???...Now...." She went out all logorrhea on him and really gave him a good one. It was hot lecture.

Alex tried to suggest an abortion and she said,

"Never ever. You know, we are believers. You have committed a sin and you need to get it right with God. We will never kill an innocent child. Gaudencia is going to get the best help, care and concern from all of us including you...in fact she is no longer a helper in this house....She is now my daughter in law"


The crossroad

"But mum, I don't love her?"

You should have thought about that before you unzipped your pants. Sonny, you made your bed and now its time to lie on it. You will marry that girl.

- Alex's Mum

"Mum, that's not fair"

 "Who said life is fair? We merely leave with the consequences of our own choices. You see, what you don't understand is that, Gaudencia is carrying my grandchild and you, his father are my son. I have a stake in this, my dear boy. Should anything untoward happen to that unborn child, then I will shave all the hair on your body with a broken bottle of beer and then circumcise you for the second time I'm I clear?"

Alex nodded in agreement.

"Good! That child is not going to be raised like a bastard. He will grow up in a family, a normal family that has a mother and father. In fact get up and start making applications because you need to plan for that baby. Get up NOW!!" She lashed at him.

Alex jumped out of bed and began spreading that bed as many thoughts swirled around in his head as he pondered over his current predicament. This situation felt like shoes were already bought and he wasn't sure whether they were too small or too big, but he had to wear them and there was no turning back. 

"Does dad know about this?" He asked

"No, he doesn't but he is about to and you had better be ready to explain yourself to him because he will grill you in his furnace", She said that as she walked out of his room. Alex's dad was a no nonsense judge. He was the direct antithesis of his mum, the kind of guy that you call nice but then you don't want to get on his wrong side because he would turn against you with a lot ferocity that would surprise both friend and foe. In short you never want to cross his path because unlike his mum, the dad was very unpredictable. He wasn't looking forward to their meeting that evening.

"So what are your plans?", his father asked him as they sat at the patio.

"I...I....i...", Alex stammered as he tried to look for something intelligent to tell his old man.

Let me help you. You have made a mistake, but you are still my son. We love you, but now you have to man up and take full responsibility.

The next 3 months are going to be very critical. Three things are going to happen; you will have gotten married, moved out and gotten a job! Congratulations my son, you have just grown up, those are three major milestones in such record time.

We will help where we can, but you will carry most of the weight. Good night"

- Alex's Dad

Alex was just baffled, his chicanery had just caught up with him and overtaken him and he was literally being fried using oil produced by his crafty brain. He was the go to guy when it came to manufacturing mischief and its by products. So this was just madness at another level.

"Solomon was right,", he thought to himself, "It's all vanity, a chasing after the wind"

That night he thought long and hard about his life and he accepted his cross. Out of the 3 things that had to be done, the most difficult was marrying Gaudencia. He wasn't in love with her, but hey his parents had given him the ultimatum. How do you cross a Judge and a surgeon? You only do that if you detest your sloppy life. A part of him wanted to rebel and do his own thing, but then again he decided not to. He reckoned that something worse might happen to him if he refused to pay attention to what he was being told. He had used his own craftiness and it had planted him here.

2 weeks later, he had landed a plum job in an auditing firm and he decided to meet with John to update him of his current predicament.  

"Man I'm getting married" He began

"Congrats man, who is the lucky girl?" John asked

Well, I have messed up. I slept with this chic who is the daughter to our house manager and she is now expecting.

Now you know mum, she always walks with that scalpel in her tongue, she never leaves it in theater. Oh, she sliced me nicely and that's after slapping me and then I met dad...wah!...he rendered the judgment in less than two minutes.

So with such a tag team, a judge and a surgeon, you don't stand a chance. So I have had to get a job and in a week's time. I will be earning my first salary. I intend to move out and get married in the next 2 months.

- Alex

Oh boy, you have been through so much. Sorry, but why didn't you talk to me? I knew that something was off but I couldn't place my finger. We have always shared stuff, even our dirty secrets that our parents don't know about....but anyway, I got your back. I don't think it's wise to marry someone you don't love, but hey I'm the outsider here. I will be with you all the way.

- John

"Thanks bro"

 "So have you started ....dating her, spending time with her?"John asked

Its not easy...but I try to talk to her.

The other day I took her out for coffee and it was like trying to date a nun. Now don't get me wrong. She is not bad looking or anything, she is just there.

It almost feels wrong. I mean, when I slept with her, I didn't think much of it because I was in the moment, but now I just feel like I have violated her and wronged her so much. I pity her more than I want to be with her, but my mum advised me that the more I spend time with her, the more loving I will become and then eventually fall in love with her.

- Alex

"So will you do a wedding?"

"Of course not, I will go to the AG and then carry her to my house. As we speak I'm house hunting"

"Don't worry, I will help you with that", John was a loyal friend, the type of guy you want to be in your team.

A month later. Alex had moved out and his relationship with Gaudencia had taken off. The speed or thrill was not there, not like Ferrari or Bugatti, it was more like an old Leyland truck that could do the basics...move you from point A to B, but before that you needed to have a meeting with yourself to console and assure yourself that you actually owned a locomotive. At least he could accompany her to the clinic and then bought her some fancy stylish dresses to accommodate her bulging frame. One day he came home to find that his mum had taken her to the saloon and she was looking good. He decided to take selfie with her that evening. That was the first gesture of affection that he had shown towards Gaudencia. She really felt special that at least he had taken note of her and took a photo and put it as his screen saver. He intended to upload it on Instagram at some point.

In about a month she would be getting married to this guy and she had no clue of how to behave as she had been raised by a single mum. She smiled at the thought of being Mrs Alex....Hmmm, not bad.

The wedding negotiations took place in Kampala. John had asked some of his friends including Alex to accompany him. That evening after everything had been done. John asked Hazel to do something for him.

"Honey, its happening. I'm going to marry you and your father has given me his blessing!"

"Awww, me too, I'm so excited and I'm so glad that everything went well. I'm go to be your wife"

Now, please do me a favour. I need you to talk to Alex. He has not been himself lately and I would like you to connect with him. I want him to know that we care about him and we will be there for him no matter what.

- John

"Are you sure about this?" She asked John

"Yes I am honey"


Alex had really tried to reform and be a good boy. He managed to suppress his surge of feelings towards Hazel so that he could just focus and get some bearing. In fact he hadn't made any attempt to contact Hazel in a long time and so it came as a surprise to him when Hazel walked up to him and asked him to go for a drive.

It now felt like the hunter has become hunted. 

They talked about so many things as they parked in a secluded spot. Hazel was a bit uptight because of their history, but then with time she loosened up and relaxed when she noticed that Alex had actually changed.

"I'm getting married", he said to her.

"You are what????," She asked

"I'm marrying Gaudencia Nyanduru, the mother of my son"

Hazel felt a huge lump swell up her throat and that's when she realized that she had unresolved feelings with Alex.

"What? You are not going to say anything?" He asked her

Nnnno...nooo...no...I'm just thinking it's not wise marry someone that you care about.

- Hazel

Well, I care about her if that's what you mean. I don't love her as yet, but my mum insists that I will eventually grow to love her.

- Alex

Hazel, nodded and Alex could tell from her body language that she wasn't amused.

"I can see...you don't want me to get married because you are jealous right? You feel bad because you still have feelings for me even though you are marrying someone else. You are marrying John the Baptist and leaving the the thrill of King David, the young rascal with ruddy features who could play a demon out of a King with his harp and slay a bear and Lion with his bear hands. That is the scallywag that you really want but then you are going for someone that you think is right for you and now you can see David going to marry another woman and you feel a stab in your heart. You can't imagine the misery of being in a wilderness eating locusts and wild honey for the rest of your life because that is the only thing that John can offer you. A consistent humdrum life that tastes like banana fibre that is what you are settling for."

He looked at her and snapped into his bad boy regimen and arrested her with his gaze.

Hazel was dumbstruck. This guy had a way of seeing and reading right through her. She felt bad that she felt this way about Alex and yet she loved John.

"Please tell me, that I'm lying." Alex said as he edged closer

Hazel was completely mum.

"Well, there is only one way to find out", Alex said in his typical bad boy,  husky seductive tone as he drew her face into his and began to methodically work on her mouth with his lips. 


You married my wife

The prey was already in the box and the predator was only too willing. Both of then were trapped in a twin some feeling. They were in a big SUV, parked in a secluded spot and it was already dark and emotions had reached fever pitch, she 'opened up her servers and gave him unlimited access' in that car and he gladly grabbed the opportunity.

None of them thought about anything, they were in the heat of the moment and they impulsively drank to their fill. The phone rang and it was John calling Hazel and she didn't pick, he called Alex who didn't answer his phone. A dark gloomy cloud enveloped them as they wiped themselves and straightened out their clothes. A huge part of Alex felt like Samson who had just carried the gates of a city. He felt sorry for John and pitied Hazel, she was marrying the guy next door without any flavor. He considered John to be a twin of Garfield the cartoon with no panache. Hazel on her part could not believe what had just happened. Her heart was aching with tumultuous guilt across the Serengeti. She had slept with Alex, in John's car. She had just fornicated. She had sinned, she had cheated on her boyfriend. 

The tension was getting heavy as both of them sat in silence. Alex got out a gum and started chewing away.

"We need to go"

Hazel looked at him

"John will call again and he will get suspicious."

"Alex, we have just had sex, we have done a grave mistake. Where is your conscience? Aren't you feeling guilty, this doesn't trouble you?"

No it doesn't, not one single bit.

What troubles me is that you are going to get married to someone that you think you love and then be miserable for the rest of your life unless of course you will be cheating on him with me.

What troubles me is that I have impregnated a lady that I don't fancy and now I have to marry her because of my indiscretions.

So both of us are trapped in this malady where we we will live with the people that we want leave. That is what troubles me Hazel because you are supposed to be my wife.

You are not supposed to marry John....

- Alex

"I love John and I will get married to him", Hazel interrupted

"Well, if you really loved him then you wouldn't have had sex with me, you would have stopped me, but you played along, you wanted me just as much as I wanted you, we belong together"

"That was a foolish decision and it will remain that, an imprudent thoughtless act and John cannot know about this."

"If he knows, then it works to our advantage. Its a win-win for both of us. There is undeniable chemistry between both of us and you can feel it. Imagine if it is allowed to incubate in the context of marriage. Think about the kids that you and I could sire. This can...."

Alex, we are not getting married, end of story. I'm engaged and this was one big mistake and you won't tell John about it.

- Hazel

She ended it and hit the ignition.

"Continue lying to yourself", he said as he reclined on the passenger's seat.

By the time they got home, Alex got out of the car and rushed towards John. Hazel panicked because she thought that he was going to spill the beans. She knew that Alex was crazy enough to ruin this whole thing in the hope that he could have her. To her surprise he saw Alex hugging John really tight and thanking him for asking Hazel to talk to him. She heaved a sigh of relief as Alex gave her the look that implied. "You are in my debt and I own you"

The troop went back to Nairobi and Alex got married to Gaudencia 2 weeks after the that incident. He tried to be happy on that day because of his family and the photos. Hazel got to meet Gaudencia and she developed an instant liking for her. Seeing her in that state even made her feel so guilty and she vowed not to be caught in that space again. John and Hazel were his witnesses at the AGs office. He was now a married man with a pregnant wife ready to fulfill his role as a husband and father, but deep down the nagging thought of Hazel still tugged at his heart.

John's marriage was coming up in a month's time and he felt that it was only right if Alex and Gaudencia would stand in as their best couple. All the way from high school, their ultimate dream was to stand in each other's wedding and it was coming to pass. He was trying really hard to break up these two love birds. John's mum at one time called him in the middle of the night to ask him, if he was sure about marrying Hazel. 

"Yes Ma, I'm certain, she is the girl of my dreams and I know that we will be happy together", John said.

But son, marriage is not about happiness or being happy. If that is the reason why you are marrying this model from Uganda then please don't do it.

- Johns Mum

"But why would you say that?"

"I feel a certain heaviness in my heart and I don't think I trust that lady"

"Mama, just go to bed, everything will be fine, you will fall in love with Hazel. She is the most beautiful person in the world"

"Okay son, if you say so. Good night"

"Goodnight Ma"

The wedding was the most difficult if not the most painful day in Alex's life. Hazel was a beautiful lady, there was no doubt about that, but on this day she looked irresistibly smashing. Her height did it all. This pretty lady was slipping through his fingers into a bland life. He clicked a 1000 times in his head.

As she walked exquisitely down the aisle, John could not help but cry...tears were running down his cheeks as he remembered the first day he saw her at the bank and how she laughed at his clumsiness. All that they had been through, coming to Kenya and today they were getting married. He was in awe of God and he allowed the tears to flow. It was a lovely ceremony, but for Alex it was bile all the way. Just seeing John kiss Hazel on her lips paralyzed his lungs, because those were his velvet lips. He was happy to leave the reception early because his wife Gaudencia was tired and needed to rest and her feet were swollen.

The lovely pair went for a 3 week honeymoon around the world and during that time Alex and Gaudencia welcomed a bouncing baby boy Alex Jr. For the first time in a long time, Alex was genuinely happy, he was holding his baby. He was thankful to his mum for slapping some sense into his dense head. It was the first time he prayed to God in months.

Hazel and John came back and settled into a new life as husband and wife in one of the leafy suburbs and for a while everything seemed normal until John was asked by his employer to go and do some work in Portugal for a month. It was tough for the new couple but then duty calls and so John flew out. On that same night Hazel felt nauseous and threw up in the middle of the night. That was really odd because she had been detoxing and she had taken fruits at lunch time and then fresh juice at around 6pm and a night cap...so it wasn't something that she had eaten.....

"Oh no.....no.....NO ....NO....", she thought wildly in her head.

"It cannot be..."

Then it hit her that she had missed her menses for about 3 months...and they had been married for 2mon.....

She didn't complete that thought, she grabbed her car keys and zoomed off to the 24 hr chemist to buy 5 pregnancy test kits. She got home in a frenzy, left the car door open and went straight to the bathroom in panic mode. All this time she was praying and hoping that she wasn't expectant....

All the 5 kits had the same result. 

She was pregnant and chances are.....

She didn't want to finish that sentence. She would go to the hospital the following day to ascertain the number of weeks.

By 8am she was at her gynae's clinic and yes her worst fears came alive. She 12 weeks pregnant. She was carrying Alex's baby!

Her heart started palpitating in rapid succession. Her system had refused to accept that reality and yet that was the truth. The doctor noticed and tried to calm her down, he explained to her the health risks of allowing herself to go down with that emotion.

Random thoughts started piling into her heart. From remorse, awkwardness, to guilt and shame. This was really bad, what would she do? Abortion was definitely out of the way...She thought of just telling her hubby that they got a honeymoon baby and just let him sink in that lie, after all men are clueless about these things...but her John was a smart person...but would he be smart enough to keep tabs on the weeks and all. What if the baby comes out looking like Alex, who happened to be light skinned with distinct features? John had a darker complexion. What if she just told him the truth? 

She took a whole two days to process this and decided to gamble and cover up her mess by lying to him that they have a honeymoon baby. John was on top of the moon. He told everyone around him and even updated his status on Facebook and Alex saw it and something clicked in his mind. He wanted to call Hazel, but then he knew that she probably won't pick so he called John to congratulate him and find out more about the baby, but poor John was clueless. 

He sent Hazel a text to irk her.

"We are expecting and you didn't tell me?"

She freaked out but chose to ignore it.

So Alex sent her a long email professing his love for her, talked about their first kiss, their intimate encounter in the car and the baby and how he is convinced that this is his baby and he will demand a DNA test..."

In the other side of the world John had told his travel agent to book him a ticket and send it to his email. He wanted to jet back into the country. In his excitement, he gave his wife's email address. The agent sent him the ticket details and when he checked and couldn't see it, his agent directed him to his wife's email and since they share a password, it was no big deal.

John's excitement fizzled out as he saw the the second unopened mail from Alex to his wife. He had to pinch himself 100 times to ensure that this wasn't Nigerian voodoo. His best friend had not only had feelings for Hazel, but they had actually slept together and ....He started fuming and paced up and down. Everyone in the office wondered what the problem was. He didn't want to believe it but then the email was long and then he started putting two and two together...from the time he was graduating....and it all added up.

He decided to call up his wife to ask how old the baby is and she lied to him.

"We are 8 weeks. Can you imagine, on our wedding night you made me pregnant. How cool is that my baby...I love you so much"

"Love you too honey," and he hung up.

Hazel was shocked, because that was uncharacteristic of him but never did she think that he would suspect anything about the baby. Maybe he was having a tough day at work and she dismissed the thought.

John deleted the ticket details and logged out of her account and that evening he flew out of Portugal and arrived in Kenya the next morning. He got home in a fit of rage demanding for straight answers from his wife. There wasn't the usual hugs and Oh, I have missed you ritual.

Honey tell me the truth and don't you dare lie to me! For how long have you been seeing Alex?

- John

Hazel wanted to deny it and put up a defense but then there was something emphatic in his voice that told her that this was a man who knew something and was not on a fishing expedition. There was no escaping. She sunk to her knees and began to cry...He gave her time to cry and after she was done, she confessed everything from that very first incident.

John couldn't believe his ears. He had kept himself, he hadn't touched her that entire time. He had told her about Alex's crazy ways with women and still she went and betrayed him. He poured out his heart in anger and then drove off without telling her where he was headed. She suspected that he could be going to see Alex, she tried calling him but she was too emotional even to type a text or make a phone call and so she just sprawled on the floor and wept because the damage was already done.

John arrived at Alex's place of work and went straight to his office. He was mean and did not care that this was a huge place of work. Alex had to take him to a private boardroom where they could discuss. 

Alex please tell me the truth and don't you take me for a fool, I'm well aware that I have been the slow one in this relationship, but please don't you even for a moment imagine that I am daft or naive so tell me why?????why Alex????????

- John

"John you don't understand...." Alex tried to look for a lie.

"You are my best friend, we have been together since form 2 and now you go seducing my girlfriend behind my back and all this time I'm thinking that..."

"My feelings got the better......I mean....I couldn't control how...."

"No wonder the first day you told me that Hazel is too good for me. You said it like a joke but you really meant it"

"No, it's not like that. You see...."

"There you go again Alex, always trying to be the smartest person in the room"

"Look, John, Hazel doesn't love you. Marrying her was a mistake, you married my wife. There it is, I have told you the truth" He said as he turned his back on John to face out of the window.

John was seething with anger, his mind was racing at 1,000,000 nautical miles per hour, there was a surge in adrenaline rush in his system and his heart was a reenactment of Mt.Pinatubo erupting in the Philippines. He couldn't believe that his best friend had betrayed him and now he was berating him.

His hands started shaking and he got hold of a small fish tank on the desk and hurled it across the room towards Alex. It exploded on his head and before he knew it, he jumped across the desk and went for Alex's neck. The two men were caught in a scuffle and fought like savage beasts for a few minutes before they found themselves next to the window of the boardroom. They were in a precarious position but neither of them had the sense of sanity to stop it and then in a flash of a second, both of them emerged from the 10th floor and went down in free fall and landed headfirst.

They both died on the spot.


Best of friends had killed each other.

No one could believe it.

No one could make sense of it.

How and why were they fighting?

When Hazel heard of the news, she went into shock and miscarried the pregnancy. The pain was just too much. She's the only one who knew the truth and yet she couldn't speak it out.

The parents and the police all grilled her but she remained tight lipped about it. John's mum was convinced that she had something to do with the whole mix but she couldn't quite figure it out. No wonder God woke her up that night to try and warn her son who was beguiled by this lady. This was something that Hazel vowed take to the grave. She had lost a baby and a husband all at once. She packed her bags, resigned and went back to Uganda and vowed never to remarry. Gaudencia was lost in all this confusion. She was beginning to adapt to this new life and now she had become a widow in less than 4 months....

 A story with a tragic and calamitous ending. 

This is a work of fiction.